So Paramount, we’re trying to make GI Joe a thing again? Have you learned nothing from the two previous movies that came out around a decade ago? In fairness to you, you did try and change it up again slightly.
This time around, the film focuses on the origin of katana-wielding badass, Snake Eyes, played by Henry Golding. We get a deep dive into how he came to take up the mantle and ultimately join the Joes. He is focused on avenging his father, who was killed when he was just a child and to do this, he must infiltrate a clan for someone who knows the whereabouts and train up to become one of their swordsmen.
There isn’t an awful lot to say about this movie, mainly because it’s only been around 48 hours, and it’s already beginning to slip from my mind. Unfortunately, the film is boring with very few moments that even feel like they’re attempting to keep you interested. It manages to feel like a very generic actioner with not a lot else to offer the audience. We’ve seen the story before, there are no real stakes, and the references to GI Joe are laughable.
To its credit, there are some well-choreographed fight scenes, particularly within the first hour of the movie. Still, to stop us from feeling like it’s getting old, it tries to throw in supernatural elements like fire stones and massive, basilisk-sized snakes, which end up conflicting heavily with the tone it was trying to strike in the first half.
It’s all about the tone; it doesn’t manage to strike it right when it starts off, so all of those supernatural things it introduces end up feeling really out of place. It was especially jarring for me when they started to try and introduce their GI Joe names with a random request coming near the end to refer to someone as ThunderStorm or something to that effect.
Ultimately, you’re left with a movie that seems to have been destined to get lost in the crowd. There is very little discussion around it, very little money made in the territories it has already opened in and all hope lost for a continuation. It’s all down to just how unnecessary the film feels. There doesn’t seem to be a reason for its existence bar toy sales. The franchise it is trying to build in the ending has that Green Lantern end credit scene feeling where you’re sat thinking, “aw, it’s cute you think there will be another one.”
Snake Eyes: GI Joe Origins is out in UK cinemas now and available to buy and rent from iTunes in the US